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Thoughts On RibFest 2013: Blooming Onion Redemption

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RibFest is totally overpriced. It’s messy, the music features throwback bands, and the food is a gamble. But we all end up going anyway. Sometimes, more than once.

The prior weekend, they started inflating the gazillions of jumping contraptions and on June 5th, RibFest opened in all of its glory. The first band to play was Sugar Ray. Welcome to 1998.

My husband received a couple of free RibFest tickets at work and refused to use them on a Sugar Ray concert. We compromised by sitting on lawn chairs and listening to them from our balcony over beers. For as much grief as I give Mark McGrath, we had a wonderful time. The evening was refreshingly cool and there was no wind, a eerie rarity on this windy prairie. We watched the band leap back and forth across the stage and I only remember laughing at them once. It was one of those tranquil moments you want to save for later and revisit when life feels overwhelming.

We went to RibFest on Friday evening when Blue Oyster Cult was performing. To save a few bucks, we enjoyed a beer at Buffalo Wild Wings before hawking over $6 per beer at the event.

My husband and I shared a boat of jalapeno cheese curds before searching for ribs. These would be the best thing we tasted that evening. I don’t remember the vendor’s name, but it was generic and served curds at a few stations. 

Stringy cheese. Crunchy, greaseless coating, and large slices of jalapenos. What’s not to like?

We settled into the long line at the Cowboys Barbeque and Rib Co. from Weatherford, TX. Several of us have actually eaten barbecue in Texas and our friends chose this stand assuming they’d be good. To give you an idea about pricing, they charged $7 for three ribs. These weren’t Flinstones-sized ribs but regular pork ribs. We ordered a half slab, plus a sides of macaroni and cheese and baked beans, each of which cost an additional $3.

Honestly, everything on this platter was rather unappealing.

The ribs were tough and fatty. Their smoked flavor reminded me of the smell of mothballs. The barbecue sauce was fine if bland.

The mac and cheese and baked beans were scooped in measly portions that couldn’t have amounted to more than a half cup each. The macaroni and cheese was lukewarm with a weird, plasticy aftertaste and I had to really fish through the watery, bland bean liquid to find any beans. Looking back over my 2012 RibFest posts, I notice we unintentionally returned to the same vendor we visited last year with similar results. It came as no surprise this vendor didn’t win any awards.

I didn’t leave until I got my blooming onion. Our second visit to Ribfest 2012 was a disaster. We quickly abandoned my quest because the scary, drunk man who stood behind me at the ATM followed us to the event and tailed us as we wove through the crowd.

The onion petals were crisp and the staff actually took time to drain off most of the oil. The orange lava flow of sauce tasted sweet. I sprinkled the onion with various seasoning salts and passed it on when I began to feel sick.

I headed home as dark storm clouds formed and strong winds transformed the hot day into a bone-chilling evening. Blue Oyster Cult played on as I walked towards the exit, flinching as I stepped in a stinky, yellow puddle.

This is a Porta Potty-only event, ya’ll. It’s loud and crowded and dirty, but chances are you’ll probably return. We all do.

My First Taste Of Bone Marrow

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Christmas week with our families was definitely enjoyable, though fatiguing for an introvert like myself.

At the end of Christmas week, we said our farewells. We headed towards The Elephant Walk in Stillwater, MN, stopping at Meritage in downtown St. Paul, for moules frites.

We have loved Meritage’s moules frites, from first bite. It’s the only thing Jake ever orders and we’ve yet to find better. The mussels are always plump and there’s nary a closed one. It’s beyond me that restaurants charge customers for mussels by the pound, yet plate closed mussels. How hard is it to check? This doesn’t happen here.

The fries are every bit as good, if not better than Barbette’s. The smokey, winey broth entices us back. We usually fill up on the charred bread, leaving little room for frites. And the soggy slice on the bottom of the bowl is my favorite.

Fortunately, we arrived during happy hour (Monday-Friday from 3-6 p.m.) which offers discounted food and beverages. Instead of chicken fingers and quesadillas, try $8 steak tartare and $5 duck confit pizza.

We shared this addictive bowl of warm, marinated olives, $5.

Then, there was the real, roasted bone marrow for only $5. I’d only seen Anthony Bourdain swoon over bone marrow on television but hadn’t encountered it in restaurants. Bourdain has mentioned that he’d choose bone marrow and parsley salad as his last meal and I have never forgotten this. Jake was just as curious.

Our wait was over.

The split bone arrived sizzling hot. It was served with toasted bread and sweet, shallot confit.

We gently scooped out the more solid bits and we ran the toasted bread through the golden drips.

It struck me like animal butter. Not so much the byproduct but the essence of. It tasted like the bits of chewy fat that line a steak. Rich in flavor with none of the gristle. Combined with the sweet, jammy onions, it was as satisfying as we hoped.

The dish regularly costs about $10.50 on the bar menu, but happy hour or not, it’s worth a taste.

Dear restaurants in Minneapolis-St. Paul and Fargo-Moorhead,

Please serve more bone marrow. 

Love,

Jen

Highs And Lows At Basies

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On date night, we got in a fight about Chili’s.

When I get hungry, I get mad. For as long as I can remember, anger and hunger have always walked hand in hand. The whole world splinters into obstacles that stand between me and food. And all I can think is “why are you preventing me from eating?”

This is why I stared at Jake with curiosity when he, not I, became angry-hungry. Normally, he is the even-keeled one, but on this evening, he became angry-hungry just short of a Hulk smash. Or tears.

We headed towards the West Acres mall with Jake fuming behind the wheel. As we drove past the  usual chain restaurants, we observed full parking lots and people waiting for tables on benches outside in the cold. I didn’t want to pick the restaurant until he started veering towards Chili’s. Then I started to care.

I really didn’t want to eat at Chili’s. I’ve only been there twice. The first time was bad while the second time was fine, albeit completely deep fried. I whined and pouted. I threatened to walk to a different restaurant. Jake was just hungry. He used to eat at Chili’s with his family growing up and thought I was entering food snob territory. Then, we both felt bad and he veered into Basies Restaurant and Lounge. I’m still now sure how we went from Chili’s to Basies, but at least we were seated immediately.

Basies is located in the Ramada Plaza Hotel. Jake once enjoyed a meal here with coworkers. At first glance, the restaurant’s appeared banquet hall-ish and a live band was performing a mix of country, blue grass and lounge music. The music was loud, but just short of drowning out conversation.

We don’t frequently dine at restaurants that sell food a la carte. This is why I agonized over my dinner selection and became stuck between an $8 salad or a $7 vegetable side. All I wanted was some protein and a small side of vegetables. There weren’t many options that combined both, besides pasta, a dinner salad or a three course meal that included a dessert I didn’t particularly want. I ordered the appetizer of bacon wrapped scallops, $15, with the side of asparagus and Hollandaise sauce, $7. Jake chose the three course dinner option, $48, that included his choice of a house salad, an entree of fillet mignon with asparagus and mashed potatoes, and his choice of dessert, creme brulee.

Jake ordered artichoke dip to start.

The large ramekin of dip was served with plenty of grilled bread. The flavor of the dip tasted well-balanced, even with the melted cheese, and we enjoyed it’s slight kick of heat.

Our server walked by with a bowl of creamed spinach. He said there was a kitchen mix-up and asked if we wanted it for free, adding he hated wasting food. We gladly accepted.  I’ve never eaten traditional steakhouse creamed spinach and this version seemed a little different. It was more like sauteed spinach in cream, rather than the thicker, casserole-like variety. I often saute spinach like this at home, so I enjoyed the dish. It was nicely seasoned and the cream tasted of garlic, though I could have done with less of the sauce. Still, it was free and generous of our server to offer it to us.

After the dip, our server brought us a bread basket. The warm rolls were crusty and came with honey butter. We didn’t dig too deeply into the basket so we could leave room for the entrees.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My scallops were large and tasted fresh. They were cooked nicely and free of grit. I scraped most of the mustard-caper sauce from the scallops. It didn’t taste bad, but struck me as heavy and I really just wanted to taste the scallops.

I also scraped most of the Hollandaise sauce from the asparagus. Again, it wasn’t that the sauce tasted bad, but it just seemed too rich. Between the artichoke dip, creamed spinach, and creamy sauce on the scallops, I had reached my threshold.  I yearned for some lemon.

The asparagus spears may have been steamed. The were a little dry, unseasoned, and the bottom of the stems were woody. I felt annoyed that the kitchen forgot or didn’t know they were supposed to remove the woody ends from a seven dollar side of asparagus.

On the other hand, Jake’s asparagus fared much better.

The asparagus spears accompanying his steak were seasoned, lightly grilled, and free of woody stems.

His steak was cooked to the requested medium rare. It was tender, nicely seasoned, and scented by the cedar plank on which it sat. We really enjoyed the garlicky mashed potatoes which struck a nice balance in texture and seasoning.

The creme brulee struck me as odd.

Our server asked if we would like the bottom of the creme brulee heated or cool. He also offered us a choice of plain, raspberry, lime, or blueberry-flavored sugars to be bruleed table side. We chose half plain and half raspberry.

After he bruleed the ramekin with a tiny torch, the sugar still glowed. I wasn’t sure if we were supposed to let the sugar continue to burn. I blew them out and extinguished the rest of the glowing embers with my finger tip. Unfortunately, the sugar didn’t exactly melt. One of the best parts of eating creme brulee is cracking the thin, glassy sheet of sugar that forms after it’s torched. The sugar on this creme brulee was too course to melt. It remained in crunchy, burnt granules. The custard didn’t taste bad, but its texture was firmer than I like.

In summary, the dinner ranged from hits to misses. The artichoke satisfied any guilty pleasure cravings, and Basies can clearly cook a steak. Despite the number of hits, there were enough inconsistencies to make me question the value of our meal.

How often does an a la carte restaurant actually deliver on a $10 Caesar salad? Or a $7 side of mixed vegetables?  What’s the true value of a $48 three course meal if the dessert is badly executed? If a restaurant charges $8-10 for vegetable sides, they’d better be close to perfect. Otherwise, maybe the restaurant should just serve some veggies with the entrees.

The service was pleasant and the live music was fun. Between sets, the band sat down to enjoy dinner with who appeared to be their families. I wouldn’t turn down an invitation to return to Basies, especially on someone else’s dime, though I wouldn’t rush back for dinner. However, it could be a pleasant spot to enjoy live music, spend a happy hour, or share appetizers.

My Take On Those Grape Jelly Party Meatballs

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All of this holiday talk is making me hungry.

This week, I found myself with two pounds of ground turkey along with odds and ends from my last trip to the grocery store. My stomach hungrily rolled along, propelled by thoughts of those sweet, sticky meatballs one often finds at parties. The type of meatballs that involve grape jelly. And the type of meatballs I find myself wishing for when I go to holiday parties, but wouldn’t dare to make an entire batch for myself

To make the meatballs, I eyeballed ingredients and mixed and matched. I heard that ground turkey could become very dry when cooked, so I might have overcompensated by adding cooked vegetables, fresh breadcrumbs soaked in cream, and Parmesan cheese. Then, I baked them. Normally, I have pan-fried the meatballs until caramelized, but I found baking to be an easier method for a weeknight. They still developed some lovely, golden-brown crust.

My husband and I were both thrilled when the meatballs were moist and tasted savory with umami. I was especially thrilled they involved little muss or fuss after a full day of school and work. This left more time for How I Met Your Mother when I probably should have been blogging.

You can serve the meatballs with any sauce you’d like. For an especially simple sauce, try dabbing them in some whole grain mustard. I made a sweet and sour sauce by combining mustard with homemade raspberry and jalapeno jelly that Jake’s cousin made.

Almost like that guilty crock pot pleasure, but not quite.

Baked Turkey Meatballs with Sweet and Sour Jelly-Mustard Glaze

I ended up adding a lot of breadcrumbs to the meatball mix to soak up the extra liquid. This didn’t negatively affect the texture of the meatballs, but I would recommend starting with one egg. 

The measurements are very approximate since I made up the recipe on the fly. Before you roll the meatballs and bake them, cook a dab of the raw meat mixture in a pan so you can taste for seasoning. 

Ingredients:

Meatballs:
2 lbs ground turkey (mine was 85/15)
2 slices of bread, torn into small pieces
Milk or cream (enough to moisten the fresh bread)
Olive oil
Mushrooms, finely diced
1/2 onion, finely diced
1 teaspoon fresh ginger root, grated (approximate)
2 cloves garlic, grated
Parmesan cheese, grated (1-2 handfuls)
1-2 eggs
Parsley, a handful, chopped
Dry breadcrumbs (I used both panko and toasted)
Salt
Pepper

Sauce:
Hot and fruity jelly (I used raspberry-jalapeno)
Mustard
Soy Sauce
Worcestershire
Mustard
Hot sauce

Instructions: 

  1. Preheat oven to about 375 degrees F.
  2. Soak the fresh bread crumbs in milk or cream until just moistened. Set aside.
  3. In a saute pan, sweat the mushroom and onion until tender. Set aside to cool slightly.
  4. Place the ground turkey in a large bowl.
  5. Grate in the fresh ginger and garlic cloves.
  6. Add the Parmesan, fresh bread crumbs softened in milk or cream, egg, and parsley. Gradually add dried breadcrumbs until the meat mixture is firm enough to form into meatballs. Add the dried breadcrumbs to the meat mixture to soak up the excess moisture. Add the bread crumbs slowly since it will take a few minutes for them to absorb.
  7. Season with salt and pepper.
  8. Test a small bit of the raw meatball mixture by cooking it in a pan to check for seasoning.
  9. Roll mixture into meatballs and place on a sheet pan covered with parchment paper.
  10. Bake until cooked through and golden brown on the outside. Flip during the cooking process for even browning.

To make the glaze:

  1. In a small saucepan, mix the jam and mustard. I used a lot of both yellow and whole grain mustard.
  2. Season with a couple shakes of Worcestershire sauce, a little soy sauce to balance the sweetness, and some hot sauce for acidity. Simmer until the flavors meld and the sauce is more like a glaze.

We served the meatballs with sauteed pea pods and mushrooms.

Birthday Week Eats: Happy Hour At Mezzaluna & Kibbe Nayyi

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The other week, it was my birthday.

We met some friends at Mezzaluna where we enjoyed their $7 happy hour plates.

 

 

 

 

 

Delightfully non-greasy, fried fish served with flavorful mushy peas, spicy seared tuna, an overflowing cheese platter, and the best burger I have tasted since I don’t know when.  Jake thinks it’s as good as HoDo Lounge’s Bison Burger, but I think it’s better.

We returned to the Twin Cities the following weekend.  Between appointments, I stopped at one of my favorite NE Minneapolis haunts, Emily’s Lebanese Deli, and savored my own plate of raw kibbe nayyi (like a Lebanese version of beef tartare).

Kibbe is an elusive food for me.

In college, my roommate occasionally treated us to tastes of her family’s triangles of baked kibbe and pungent garlic sauce.  Once, she invited us to taste little packets of both raw kibbe and vegetarian kibbe made with potatoes.  This was my first taste of raw meat and I liked it.

Kibbe brings to mind an afternoon soon after my college graduation where I spent much of a day trying to replicate her family’s baked kibbe in my tiny, studio aparatment kitchen on Dupont Ave.  It was a time-consuming version of kibbe of which I stuffed raw layers of meat with a cooked filling before baking.  Unfortunately, it did not turn out well.  A few steps above terrible.

My last taste of raw kibbe was at Beirut in West St. Paul, where I shared a small dish with friends.  I tried to be as polite as possible by taking gentle, unhurried bites, in order to hide my intense craving for it.

But not this time.

For lunch, I chose a half order of kibbe nayyi along with sides of tabouli, flat bread, and garlic dressing which totaled about $10 including tax and tip.

The half portion was more than substantial.  For once, I took my time and enjoyed my very own plate of kibbe nayyi.  I read a book and watched people stroll the farmers market across the street while I used flat bread to scoop olive oil-drenched dabs of kibbe and swipe them through garlic dip.  The kibbe had a buttery texture and clean flavor.  It was nicely salted and tasted of onion, parsley and cumin.  And I liked how it contrasted with the tart tabouli.

This was my happy birthday present to myself.  Not only the whole plate of kibbe nayyi, but also the realization that I can by just go order my own plate of kibbe nayyi when the craving strikes.

Fargo Beer Festival 2012: Pacifico & Roasted Pork

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This weekend, a few of us attended the Fargo Beer Festival held in the Civic Center.  The event’s website boasted samples of “over 120 premium craft beers from around the world,” as well as food options including a pig roast for $23/ticket.

I’m more of a wine girl that a beer girl, but thought the event would be a fun opportunity to try new beers and check out the food.

We arrived at the beginning and waited in a relatively short line for the doors to open.  Wrist banded and tickets in hand, we stopped to review the Fargo Beer Festival Program.  I was very surprised to see that a large percentage of the beers were not those I would have considered “premium craft beers.”  They were varieties I commonly see but wouldn’t go to an event just to taste.  Some examples included seven varieties of Leinenkugel’s, Summit, Crispin Cider, Boulevard, Becks, Blue Moon, Dos Equis, Heineken, Sam Adams, Killian’s, Red Stripe, Corona & Corona Light, Amstel Light, and Pacifico.

The first room we explored contained the craft beers we were unfamiliar with.  Vendors sat at tables that lined the rooms’ perimeters and poured samples from bottles into tasting cups.  The lines for beer samples were never very long, except for about two tables sampling the most unique craft beers.  Although there were a couple of police offers stationed in each room, the crowd seemed to remain laid back and well-behaved, even though attendees could return to tables for multiple samples.

After I consumed about five samples, I felt a little bit drunk and quite full.  I warily eyed the enormous, foodless room and refrained from eating a young woman’s homemade pretzel necklace.  Three more samples later, we called it quits and searched for food.  The roasted pig wasn’t available yet, so I settled for Civic Center nachos with goopy cheese sauce, $2.50.  Maybe it was the beer food goggles, but the nacho cheese sauce hit the spot.  Ideally, I wold have loved to see snacks provided in the beer halls as well as additional food vendors, but props to the convention center for not inflating their food prices.

We indulged in a few more samples until the roasted pig was served.

The roasted pig was provided by One on One Professional Catering, connected with the Garden Pavilion Restaurant and Banquet Facility.

We thoroughly enjoyed these roasted pork sandwiches, $6, and beer cheese soup, $4.

The pork was tender and succulent and we heaped the sandwiches with barbecue sauce and grated horseradish (I wonder if there was crispy pig skin and if so, who got it eat it?).  The beer cheese soup was also tasty.  Slightly spicy and sweet with beer, although it had that viscous Cheez Whiz texture.  Bertrosa’s, located in Downtown Fargo, makes my favorite beer cheese soup ever.  It’s the spiciest version I’ve ever tasted and the only one that doesn’t have a shiny Cheez Whiz texture.  That being said, One to One’s was one of the better versions I’ve tasted.

Besides One To One and the Civic Center food stand, the only other food option was a local company at a table selling beef sticks.  You could buy 2 for $2 or a box for $25.  Jake bought a couple, though I passed since I thought they were too dry.

After dinner, I felt more than beered out.  The boys indulged in a few more samples while I sobered up and people-watched.  I was impressed with Night Owl Driving, who was stationed outside the Civic Center to offer attendees free rides home.

Closing thoughts. . .
I’ve come to the conclusion that I just might not like beer.  Cheap beer or craft beer, I’m just not that into it.  Just give me a light Mexican beer with lime or Sapporo.

The event was generally fun and I didn’t see one person getting sick or rowdy.

The lines were short, except for those sampling legitimate craft beers like abbey ales and other brews not available in every liquor store (event organizers should take this hint).

We enjoyed trying some of the newer or more unusual craft beer varieties, however, I wasn’t that impressed with much of the beer selection.  Especially considering that the event advertised, “over 120 premium craft beers.”  I should probably have taken a closer look at the website’s beer list beforehand.  Jake adds that if you can easily buy certain beers in Midwestern grocery stores or gas stations, they probably shouldn’t be advertised as premium craft beers.  I actually like Corona Light, but the fact that it was sampled at this event made me giggle.  Scratch some of the series of beers ordered by the pitchers at Midwestern bars everywhere, and replace them with craft brews that we’re not all entirely familiar with.

My favorite part of the event was the roasted pork and beer cheese soup.  I know the focus of the event is beer, but beer really needs food.  A few more vendors or conveniently located snacks might have made it easier to sample beers, sober, and also attracted a greater number of people who may like beer and love food.

Would we go again?  Probably not.

Once was fun.  Once was enough.

2012 Minnesota State Fair Visit: Great Balls Of Fire!

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I look forward to going to the Minnesota State Fair like I look forward to Christmas.  Possibly more.

Like many other Minnesotans, I grew up making my annual pilgrimage to this Great Minnesota Get-Together.

The fair reminds me of an old high school romance who took me to ride the Sky Ride cable cars and read me a poem asking me to be his girlfriend.  It rhymed and was illustrated with stick-figure depictions of us holding hands.  The fair brings to mind my first taste of cheese curds.  And it makes me think of my mom’s last visit to the fair, during her last summer on earth.  She managed to rally for an hour, so we could push her around in a wheelchair and collect some of her favorite foods. These usually included a cream puff, skin-on french fries, a pronto pup, and cheese curds, of course.

For years, my running favorite treat were Australian Battered Potatoes doused in both ranch and cheese sauces.  One year, my mom and I ended a fair outing with these potato planks which inundated us with enough grease to result in horrible stomach aches.  I remember curling up in bed and praying for daylight.  And thus, I never ate Australian Battered Potatoes again.

As an adult, my visits to the fair are brief, but no less anticipated.  The crowds and the heat drive me batty.  Now that we live out of town, a weeknight jaunt was no longer an option so we gritted our teeth and visited on the last Saturday of this year’s run.  The day was hot and the sun relentlessly beat down on us as we ran between un-air conditioned buildings and scouted for spots of sidewalk shade.  We bumped into the people who randomly stopped mid-step, avoided collisions with massive strollers, and waited in lines for bathrooms.

During our 2012 State Fair visit, we shared a couple of old favorites and a few new foods, referencing Heavy Table’s definitive 2012 MN State Fair Food Tour.

By 10 a.m. we had already laid a base of coffee within our stomachs and added $5 cheese curds from the Mouth Trap in the food building.

I’ve had the curds from the Mouth Trap and I’ve had curds from the stand on Dan Patch.  Personally, I choose to just go to the Mouth Trap.  There’s nothing significant that I can add to the MN State Fair cheese curd conversation so I will end by saying I like these. I always like these, and I don’t visit the state fair without these.

Next, we stopped at Sausage Sisters & Me, a vendor also located in the food building.  I have never visited them before, but read many positive reviews of their Great Balls Of Fire, $5.50, a new offering.

These meatballs were by and far, the best thing we tasted at the 2012 fair, if not at any fair.  They were notably juicy and compellingly spiced.  Not quite like traditional sausage, not quite like jerk, and pleasantly spicy.  They brought to mind Spoonriver’s flavorful lamb burger.  My Sausage Sister & Me offers a variety of squirt bottles of sauces.  We chose the creamy cucumber sauce which jived well with the strong flavors.

We tried another frequently mentioned new food, Famous Dave’s Ragin’ Ankles, $6.

The pork was tender and moist, and easily fell off the bone.  They were fatty in a pleasant way and we enjoyed the sauce which was slightly spicy and sweet without being too sweet.  Overall, we enjoyed the BBQ ankles, but thought the Great Balls of Fire were better.  I wished the ankles had a little crust or crunchiness.

Saturday’s beverage breaks included Lift Bridge’s Hop Dish, $4.50, from the Ballpark Cafe.  Jake thought Hop Dish tasted a lot like Bell’s elusive Hopslam, his favorite beer, adding that it had a “similar start with a smoother finish.”  He enjoyed it so much that he tried to find it in the stores that evening only to learn it’s not available, yet, in bottles.

We shared a refreshingly cold Black Cherry Soda, $3, from the Spring Grove Soda Pop stand.  We both thought it was pretty tasty with no complaints.  I was satisfied with a few sips since it was so sweet my lips were sticky.

The third new food we tried was a cannoli from Ole’s Cannoli.  Cannoli’s happen to be one of Jake’s favorite desserts.

Jake ordered a plain cannoli with its ends dipped in chocolate chips, $4.50.  The cannoli was generously sized.  Its shell was crispy and the filling was thick and slightly tart, reminding me of cheesecake.  Jake had no complaints.  As an individual who doesn’t routinely seek out desserts, I found two bites enough.  I have a low threshold for desserts that are rich and sweet.

My last bite at the fair was a fried onion blossom.  Ever since Fargo’s Ribfest debacle in June, I’ve had a hankering for an onion blossom.  I forked over $8 for this large monstrosity.

The batter was crispy in a mouth-puncturing way and tasted like it was seasoned with nothing in particular.  The ranch dip tasted cheap and at least one, heaping tablespoon of grease pooled on the bottom of the plate.  The only redeeming qualities of this onion blossom were that it was fried, the onion was tender and sweet, and it wasn’t the $1 shrimp cocktail.

And with this terrible onion, our brief 2012 Minnesota State Fair visit came to a close with little nausea, stomach discomfort, or ailment that couldn’t be cured with a good nap.

Hopefully we’ll be able to celebrate next summer with both the North Dakota and Minnesota State Fairs.

Our Detroit Lakes Weekend Part II: Hotel Shoreham & Fireside Restaurant

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After spending a lazy morning lounging around The Lodge on Lake Detroit, I shook Jake from his video game trance and summoned him to lunch.

I chose Hotel Shoreham, a small restaurant mostly known for its pizza, located on Lake Sallie.  Still feeling “za’d” out from the previous evening at Zorbaz, we opted for nothing that included a “Z.”

Jake ordered a fruity beverage that ended up costing $9 and I ordered a bottle of St. Pauli Girl, $4.75, having no clue that it did not contain any alcohol.  My beer connoisseur fiance laughed at me.

We started with a basket of beer batter fried shrimp, $9.95, which arrived scalding hot and nearly grease-free.

Salads came with our entrees.  The greens were fresh and crisp and I dipped them in the house dill dressing, that reminded me of that bread bowl party dip.

The $11 crab cake was about the size of my palm.  It’s crispy exterior was drizzled with a garlicky mayonnaise sauce.  The interior revealed some breading, flakes of crab along, and a few small lumps of meat.  Overall, we enjoyed its flavor, but felt it was pricey considering its size.  Oceanaire may charge about $15 per crab cake, but they are larger and made exclusively with jumbo lumps bound together with little more than sorcery.  Not quite the case at Hotel Shoreham, but not bad.

We split the walleye sandwich, $11.95.

The fish fillet’s batter was crispy and greaseless, and the flesh was delicate and sweet.  We rejoiced at the toasted bun.

After lunch, we drove around Lake Sallie, hoping to find some sort of beach or dock from which we could dangle our feet.  We chased deceptive signs that pointed us towards nonexistent beaches.  We circled around luxurious lake homes and wooded lots sheltering what we imaged were the cabins of kings.  Lake Sallie must be an exclusive lake, as we could not find even a strip of publicly accessible land.  Finally, we finally found a public dock that reached into water covered in green scum so thick that birds traveled across it by foot.  We passed.

When we returned to The Lodge, I took a nap and slept off that St. Pauli Girl.

For dinner, we chose the Fireside Restaurant located a few blocks from The Lodge.  By 8 p.m., it calmly buzzed with customers and we sat on the screened porch overlooking the lake.  We felt like we’d been transported to a sleepy veranda on the deep south.  Diners leaned into their chairs and lingered over their dinners as servers gracefully allowed everyone to bask in the sunset.

I ordered a mojito for $6.50.

Despite the mojito’s whimsical swizzle sticks, it was quite dreadful.  The mint didn’t appear to be muddled, the liquor was light, and and it tasted like the smell of your mother’s L’Occitane bath soap.  Jake fared better with a glass of red wine.

We snacked on a complimentary plate of “no-frills” vegetables and dip.

And picked out the buttery garlic toasts from the breadbasket (also complimentary).

For an entree, I ordered a Caesar salad with anchovies, $6, and the Surf &Turf Skewers appetizer, $11, that consisted of bacon-wrapped beef and scallops in a “tangy honey-mustard sauce.”  Jake ordered the 10 oz. prime rib special. $23, offered with his choice of two sides.  He selected grilled asparagus and garlic mashed potatoes.

The Caesar salad greens were fresh and dotted with croutons coated in something cheesy and a little bit spicy.  Kudos for offering anchovies.

I began to feel full and gingerly tasted the skewers.

The beef was cooked to about medium and was tender.  Although the large scallops were fresh and buttery, mine contained noticeable grit.  Jake ate the second and deemed it grit-free, pushing aside the soggy bacon which I happily ate.  He prefers bacon cooked ultra crispy while I like mine with some give.  I’d hardly describe the sauce as tasting like honey mustard.  Its sweetness tasted much more subtle and melded with the grilled meats.

Jake delicately carved bites of his prime rib and dunked them in au jus and horseradish sauce.  The meat was tender and cooked medium rare as requested.

The side of asparagus was carefully grilled (ends trimmed) and garnished with a hollandaise-like sauce and lemon wedge.

Since it was the end of our vacation, we split creme brulee.

At first glance, I was disappointed the sugar topping wasn’t more caramelized.  But after I dug below the surface, I was too hooked to care.  The smooth chocolate custard tasted exactly like the essence of a chocolate brownie.  Jake began to reminisce about the brownies his late, Norwegian Grandma used to make.

We were stunned when our bill was almost equivalent to our lunch at the Shoreham Hotel.  Fireside is known as the pricier option in Detroit Lakes, but served a better-than-average meal for lower prices than what we’d find in Fargo-Moorhead and the Twin Cities.

I really appreciate the juxtaposition of Fireside’s stunning lake view and unpretentious service/atmosphere.  While the staff is down to earth, the occasional customers may be more high maintenance.  I laughed as I eavesdropped on a conversation that mirrored this Portlandia sketch.  We had practically finished two courses by the time they placed their order.

Hopefully, we’ll return to Detroit Lakes this summer.  Where do you like to eat and do you have a favorite dive-bar?

Fried Rice Seasoned With Gochujang & Miso

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My heart sank when I realized I had no soy sauce.  I had just chopped a mound of vegetables and de-frosted meat, only to discover an empty soy sauce bottle in my fridge.

With two takeout boxes of leftover steamed rice and a half hour of prep work done, there was no way I was not going to make fried rice.  I reached further into my fridge and pulled out a jar of Korean gouchujang and my trusty tub of year-old miso paste.

Then I proceeded like normal.  I stir fried my vegetables with a little Chinese sausage, chicken breast, and leftover rice.  Then, I flavored the fried rice with a mix of gochujang and miso paste, diluted with water for easier incorporation.  I found Chinese sausage at the Asian & American Market in Fargo.  It provided a subtle sweetness that balanced the miso’s saltiness and gochujang’s heat.

We were satisfied with the result.  So much so, that we polished off the skillet of fried rice.  If you just own a regular kitchen skillet, you probably won’t get any smokey char, but your fried rice will still be a respectable home variation.

My method of cooking fried rice is not an exact science.  Once I choose my vegetables and proteins, it’s basically a process of sautéing and tasting.  You could use soy sauce instead of miso and add additional seasonings like hot peppers and ginger.

Mantra: Homemade fried rice is easy.  Homemade fried rice is an efficient way to use up leftover meat and veggies.  Homemade fried rice puts extra takeout rice to work.

Ingredients
Vegetable oil
Chinese sausage, finely diced
Chopped vegetables (I used lots of onion, green onions, swiss chard stems and greens, and carrots)
Proteins of choice and/or scrambled egg
Leftover rice
1 clove of minced garlic
Miso paste and gochujang, diluted with some water
White pepper
Cracked black pepper

Directions
In a dab of vegetable oil, begin sauteing the Chinese sausage.  When it renders a bit, add the vegetables and stir until softened but al dente.  I add the vegetables that take longer to cook first, such as carrot and onion.  Then, I add the softer vegetables like chard leaves, green onion, and garlic.

As the vegetables are cooking, prepare any additional protein or scrambled egg in a separate pan.  Add a little more oil to the vegetables and then stir in the rice.  As the rice is cooking, flavor with diluted miso paste and gochujang, black pepper, and white pepper.

Add the scrambled egg and/or other cooked meat and combine.  Taste and adjust for seasoning (I used a lot of miso and gochujang).

Cook to your liking.  I prefer my fried rice to develop some crusty bits.

Week(ends) In Review: Heartland, Our First CSA Box & Ribfest

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Weekends in the Twin Cities are wonderful, though they leave us scrambling for breath as we return, racing back to work.

Amidst the excitement of last weekend’s TECHmunch and family festivities, our parents collaborated on planning a surprise engagement dinner at Heartland located in downtown St. Paul, MN.  If I had been quicker on my feet, I would have arranged my own surprise by ordering our marriage paperwork from the county and a pastor to meet us at dinner.

Our parents have only met on one occasion and so I was a little anxious about the gathering of our families.  I ordered something green and something strong.  I don’t remember what it contained besides lime juice and gin, but what I do remember is that it was extremely strong.  I coughed my way through the first few sips and resolved to drink it slowly, lest I take down my own engagement dinner.

One of our servers seemed concerned that it remained so full.  He checked in a few times to ask if I was enjoying the beverage.  I tried to reassure him that although it was delightful, it was incredibly strong for my likes.  I steadily sipped the drink and even passed it around for others to enjoy.  Somehow, we hardly made a dent.

We had a grand time enjoying each others’ company and tasting all of the dishes.  On this evening, chicken reigned supreme.  Those of us who ordered the Fauna tasting menu began with a small piece of moist, crispy-skinned chicken.

It rested on sweet, beautifully cooked vegetables and vibrant beet broth.  Even the most cautious of eaters declared it the best chicken he had ever eaten.

Five others ordered the chicken entree.  Again, lots of crispy, seasoned skin and succulent meat.  Even the white meat was buttery tender and flavorful.

This past Thursday, I picked up our first CSA box from Bluebird Gardens of Fergus Falls, MN.  After months of receiving anticipatory emails updates, I giddily unloaded our first bounty onto our kitchen counter.  I gently examined the delicate lettuce, radishes, spinach, spring onions, a petite kohlrabi, and my favorite; a bag of pea sprouts.

Processing the vegetables and stuffing them into our fridge took time, but was well worth the effort.  Now, I can easily grab the vegetables and incorporate them into our meals.  We’ve been feasting on giant fattoush salads made with toasted pita bread and everything in our box.  Let me know if you are willing to share any of your favorite uses for CSA vegetables.  Especially kohlrabi.  I didn’t hate my first taste of kohlrabi but am wondering how I will ever fall in love with it.

I plan to submit bimonthly updates about what I create with my CSA boxes to Simple, Good & Tasty.

Finally, there’s Ribfest which began on Wednesday and ends this evening.  Festivities include seven rib vendors, additional food and beverage vendors, a large music stage that features 80′s hair bands and country music, and an expansive array of blow-up jumpy things.

I think the blow-up jumpy things almost outnumber the rib vendors 2:1.

Last evening, we visited Ribfest and sampled ribs from two vendors.  Cowboys BBQ & Rib Co. of Forth Worth Texas boasted an extensive array of awards but their ribs were woefully tough and covered in flabby skin.  I hope this can be chalked-up to a bad evening.  Otherwise, I can’t imagine them winning anything.

On a positive note, I enjoyed their barbecue sauce which seemed well-balanced.

We also tried ribs from Aussom Aussie’s BBQ of Pittsburgh.  These were much better.

The meat had a better texture and a smokier flavor, though they were slightly fatty.  The exterior had some bark and the sauce was lovely.  It had a little heat and that vinegary note that I love so much about Ted Cook’s.  

We’re hoping to return for a blooming onion and to sample some more rib vendors.